


the light over yonder

by unknown_scribe



Category: Dan Howell - Fandom, Phan, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Phil Lester - Fandom, dan and phil
Genre: AU, Fantasy AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-23
Updated: 2018-06-28
Packaged: 2018-09-26 13:20:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9898934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknown_scribe/pseuds/unknown_scribe
Summary: Even the darkest shadow needs a bright light to exist...





	1. the shadows that shone bright

**Author's Note:**

> this isn't really about a particular ship, just imagine your otp or something. i just used dan and phil because that's the feeling this is giving me.

Flaws. All our lives we are told we have them. That everyone has them. That you're not human without them. But sometimes it feels others have deeper flaws, bigger shadows that hung over their heads. Then there are the ones we place on high perches. The celebrities and gods we hold dear to us and follow with undying love. The ones we see as having no flaws. But I saw myself as one of the lowest in our corrupt society. I saw myself as no more than lowly trash, a horrible cancer on society that needed discarding. I felt my flaws were the most visable, the most ugly. I felt these shadows shone most brightly to darken the colours of others. But there was one that didn't see me in such a way.  
He was my best friend. he was the one who tried to help, tried to buff and polish my worst cracks or convince me i was perfect. That he still loved me no matter what and that he always would. It was kinda cheesy crap, but he always was that way. But i couldn't deny he was the best. He was the only Phil Lester. 

I was always fond of the beach. The soft sand that got fucking everywhere, the waves that came and went so rhythmically, without cause or purpose, the solitude that came with rainy days. It was open and welcoming, the sea calling of a life of un-judged solitude. And the blue, oh the blue. It was such a warm blue, and it held a thousand colourful fish, all swimming so happily. It was such a knowledgeable blue, holding timeless and unexplored wonders and sea creatures and monsters. It was a blue I considered home. Travelling with my work all over the land, i had seen some of the most beautiful beaches, yet nowhere did i feel more at home than on my beach. I had decided long ago to live on this beach, of course, my whole class had. What was it? 6, 7 years? But even so young as 18 i had known where i wanted to live. Knew where i fit in; on the outskirts of the small walled city with the other outcasts.  
The sand felt softer than usual as I strolled along. The first sun was rising, casting a soft orange blanket on the world. I stopped and watched a while, it wouldnt be long until the other sun came up. This was my favourite part of getting up early. I laughed slightly and shook my head, thinking about how Phil hated getting up early, no matter how hard i tried to tell him it was prettiest earliest. A slight breeze had begun, sending a shiver down my back and blowing my fringe across my face slightly. I pulled my collar tighter around my neck. I stared at the soft waves rolling in and out, in and out. Today was going to be rough, i could feel it. Sighing, I turned to return to my small shack and get dressed.  
I laid out the stiff red uniform on my bed. The tight necked collar sat proudly on the military style jacket. The black sash had a soft sheen and would lay nicely across my right shoulder. The black trousers were neatly pressed . The boots glinted in the dull light. The helmet sat on the table, rusting slightly in places. With a heavy heart, i began to dress, dreading of what was to come. Hopefully, he wouldn't be too upset...


	2. candles that guide

The gleaming buildings stood high above the outer wall. Reflecting the orange of the first sun made them seem like candles. Tall candles to guide the weary home. But I didn't need guiding back, I needed to get away. I dreaded going into the city, but it was only a quick stop. They hardly ever needed my services in the city anyway. No, this was going to be a quick visit to say goodbye.  
I trudged heavily, my boots kicking up red dust as I walked. my hand was starting to hurt slightly from carrying my bag on my shoulder, but I was used to it. I shrugged my shoulder to readjust the black rucksack. It wasn't that far from the beach I lived on, but it was early in the morning and my body was just beginning to wake up. I turned on the anti-glare on my visor to avoid the glare off the buildings. The looming gate to Alendria soon welcomed me. The tall stone walls lead you to question how they were made. The buildings were a mixture of old and new, stone buildings that were crumbling seemed to sprout strange limbs of glass and metal. They twisted and reached upward as you went further into the city. horse and carts travelled up and down road and streets, some joined different buildings, floating effortlessly in the sky. It was too unnatural and I hated it. Even at this early time, the streets were full of people selling things, buying things, hustling and bustling here and there. I stood at the gate and contemplated; did I need to do this? would it not be better to just leave and not say anything? I played with my sash nervously. of course I had to do this. Id hate myself if I didn't. He'd hate me if I didn't.  
I turned down the outsiders visability on my visor and tried to blend in with the crowd. I wanted to disappear into the ground, to avoid all the odd stares I was imagining. I felt that the sash and the red jumper singled me out as the assassin I was. I needed to find phil.  
It was hard to miss him. He stood out so much from all these horrible people. He was sat on a bench in his pale green jumper. He seemed so much brighter than these dull people. His fringe swept softly across his face. His bright blue eyes were comforting and welcoming. He seemed to be staring at something in the sky, his expression kind of sad. I paused in the streets, people cursed as they bumped into someone who seemed to just appear. Nerves began to build up. How would he take it? we had known each other for years but now I was just leaving. I breathed deeply and began the seemingly long climb up the hill. He was the only candle I needed.  
"Hey, Phil..." I flipped up my visor just as I came to his bench. It was always his bench. No one else ever sat there.

"oh, hey there Danny!" he smiled softly at me, his eyes lingering on the sky. 

"Whatcha looking at?" I sat gingerly on the bench, removing my helmet. I was tryig to stall, but he didn't hear it.

"don't you just love love the colour of the sky? when both the suns are up, its great. It's like everything is balanced in the world. And the clouds, they're so free....." he trailed off, his eyes clouding and seeming distant. I stared at him, taking in all his features. It could be the last time I see them.

"Listen..." he snapped back to look at me, his features suddenly serious, but still so angelic.  
"we need to talk..."


	3. an unquenchable light

"Leaving, huh?" he was so calm about it. He just concentrated on the sky, deep in thought. Sighing, he closed his eyes. "And you were going to leave your best friend behind?" he rested his head against the back of the bench. 

"Y-yeah." I stuttered. I was ripping myself in half telling him this. Of course I was, he was my best friend for gods sake. How was he so calm? Then again he was usually pretty calm. I began to play with the ends of my sash again. He hummed thoughtfully. I was suddenly aware of all the people passing by, of the suns scorching in their sky, of the high buildings all around us, of the streets and pathways hanging in the sky. I yearned for my beach and see the blue again. Eventually, he opened his eyes. he seemed to have reached an internal conclusion. Sighing, he stood and stretched. 

"well then, ill just go and pack my bag shall I?" I was stunned. he wasn't serious was he? He couldn't be. I knew how much his life here meant to him. That he had all his friends and family, he had his gardening job. He was the best in his job and I will be damned if I'm going to be the one to ruin it.

"what are you talking about? You cant come with me, your life is here! your job is here!" I stood to face him, trying to talk him out of it.

"I want to go with you, to go and see what's outside these walls. It could be fun! see all the monsters and things that are out there. Besides, you can't leave your best friend behind!" I didn't know what to say. There was just no stopping him. I felt my jaw flap up and down, trying to find the right words, try to make him stop, but he had run into his flat before I could.

"for gods sake..." I shook my head, grabbed my helmet and ran after him. 

I had been inside his flat many times, but it always surprised me in some little way. Whether it was the bold greens and blues or the various homely little things or the new houseplants, it always shocked me how comforting it felt. "Phil?" The light shone in the big window, warmly illuminating everything in the small flat. But I was too busy to fully appreciate it right now. "Phil!" Was he packing the whole house? I ra into the kitchen, panic starting to set in slightly. I ran around the flat but there was no sign of him. Until I reached the kitchen. the only thing that was left was a shred of bright green fabric in a small pool of blood. The breeze from the open window was warm.


	4. panic is blinding

Shit. This couldn't be happening. The first emotion that hit me was panic. Slowly washing over me like a tide. I couldn't breathe. I sank to the floor, disbelief starting to seep in as I connected the dots. The tears were close to falling. I hoped beyond hoping that he was messing. That he was going to jump out of the closet in his usual cheeriness and laugh at the tears streaming down my face. But the drips of blood out the window told a different story. I hated the world, hated the fact that people would only miss him when their plants were dying, hated that someone would even touch phil. I reached for the concealed blade in my trousers. It was my comfort in times like this. I needed to get out of this increasingly smaller flat. Needed to run, to find something to blame for this, something to kill. "hey, watch it!" I didn't realise I was running until I ran into someone carrying an apple crate. They crashed to the ground, breaking and rolling everywhere. But I was more concerned about my best friend than some fucking apples right now. "oh, sorry..." I picked up an apple and handed it to them. " Hey, wait a minute! you just gonna give me one apple and run away? what the hell am I gonna sell now?" I was verging on the edge of swinging. Could this guy not see I was an armed fucking assassin? But he managed to push me over the edge. I drew the blade and held it to his throat. these townies needed to learn to leave me alone. "Listen, I don't give a fuck about your apples. What I care about is the fact my best friend has just gone missing and unless you are blind and can't see the bright red assassin's uniform I'm wearing, then surely you will know that right now, I need to fucking murder someone. so I suggest you pick up your shitty apples and get busy selling them before I slit you throat. I'm in a hurry..." I glanced at his nametag "ok Chris?" I dropped the curly haired guy and began to walk away again. "Wait a minute, aren't you Dan? As in Phil's best friend? He's missing? Is that where you're going? Can I go too- "Look you can come if you just shut the fuck up, ok? you ask too many questions, Jesus fuck." "We're gonna need someone though. He's a doctor, he can help." "Whatever." I could feel the tears beginning to well up again. the more time we wasted, the more I could be losing phil. Chris all but ran up to the little house on the end of the street. I hated this. New people and they weren't taking this seriously. But they would come in useful. I decided to wait outside, having avoided doctor's all my life, I wasn't going to break the tradition just yet. After a long wait, the two finally appeared. Chris bounded up like a child, eager to show off his friend, the other seemed to be washing his hands, a slight worried look on his otherwise relaxed face. "This is PJ, PJ this is Dan, Phil's friend. He says Phil is missing and he needs our help." I shook his hand, eager to just get going. "We're friends of Phil's, we'll help in any way we can." and thus, we three set out, blind to what was to come.


	5. Strike a match

Ideas are a funny thing. Often they come and go and might not stick around for long. Bright hot flashes of an idea before its blown out. But sometimes, a small idea may spark off into a full thing. Its own, unwavering in the wind. This tiny idea can spread like wildfire, causing havoc, or it can be controlled with a single candle. And yet, in times of panic, even the smallest idea can spark off against other matches.  
"Shit, what do we do?" Chris paced back and forth, hands in his hair, fear brewing behind his eyes. I guess being an apple vendor, you don't see much blood. He spun to look at his friend.  
"PJ surely- surely you can do something?"   
"I'm a doctor Chris, unless someone is physically dying in front of me, or you have a week to spare for lab results, there is-"   
"A week?! We can barely afford to stand here and discuss harebrained tactics. I have an idea. Its stupid, and there's barely any chance it will work... I thought your police were supposed to be good at this kind of shit?" A stupid remark I know. The police in town all have the shared IQ of a broom handle. But it has more of a chance of working than my plan.   
"No the police would just say the same thing. No body, not our case. Bloods would take a week." I stared at the small pool of blood that had now collected at the base of the window. The suns glinted eerily on a drop that traced delicately down the window. Where blood had touched was now brown and dried. We had to do something and fast or this match will burn out.   
"Alright Chris, run to the bathroom. Try and find me tweezers and some hairpins or safety pins. Anything small and metal." Chris nodded and scampered off.   
"PJ I nerd you to find me some matches and candles. I've got the rest." He hesitated.   
"What are you gonna do?"   
"Don't worry, I have a plan. Its faint but its worth a try." His eyes glazed over slightly before he began checking all the cupboards he could see.   
  
After a few minutes of frantic searching, we reconvened in the kitchen. "I've got tweezers, a couple hairpins and a sewing needle." Chris held out his slightly sharing hand, slowly uncurling his fingers to let the metal gleam through. "And I got two candles and half empty box of matches." I laid the objects neatly beside my visor, along with a hammer I had retrieved. Chris pulled up a chair and bounced his leg nervously. PJ stood on my right one hand cradling the other with doubt. A single sticky bead of sweat coursed its way down my back. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I struck my match.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So wow, it has been like more than a year since I last updated this thing but I'm determined to finish at least one project. Here we go...


End file.
